there have been a number of developments recently that make me question where we're heading to. there was a murder of an african student in malaysia, the rising costs of living, sexual abuse allegations against timber companies logging in sarawak, banks collapsing, a murder on queen street.

 

is this going to be a depressing post? maybe. but if you could help me find some answers it wont have to be that way. 

 

an african student was stabbed in malaysia recently. i have no details about what has happened. all i know is that i read it on marina mahathir's blog.   it really makes me question what is going on back home. reading the comments is quite terrifying because a number of people are saying that the foreign students brought it upon themselves. another bunch of people are saying that its no surprise seeing as to how racially driven malaysia can be. to me, this is not the issue here. malaysia is a host nation for these students. they left their homes, their families to come to malaysia to study and face blatant racism. and all we can say to that is "well whaddaya expect?". something is not right about that. if anything were to happen to any of malaysia's students who are studying overseas, sponsored or not, the reaction from the host nation would be immediate. apologies, trying to make peace,guarantees of security and safety etc. why is it that we malaysians are allowing international students who come to study in our country experience the ugly, judgemental side of malaysian society and not do anything to amend it? dont you know what kind of impression this leaves on the students? they will be the ones going back to their home countries, and, more likely than not, will be the ones making the dcisions later on to have deals with malaysia or not. what kinda grave are we digging for ourselves here?

 

i'm not offering any solutions here. what i am saying is: 

1. how can we blame foreign students for the racism they experience in our own country?
   
2. how can we say that its no surprise and not do something to fix it? how does this reflect on us?
   
3. what are we showing to the international student body regarding the values we have in terms of how we are handling this?
   

the reason that i believe we are at fault is because WE ARE THE HOST NATION. we open our doors to an international student committee and then we allow them to be treated badly. is that not our fault?

 

next issue that really bothers me, and its affecting me personally is this issue of sexual abuse of penan women by timber workers.   why is nothing being done? is it just because these women live in the interior part of sarawak? thats no reason to let them be abused like this. its such an injustice. these people take our timber and they abuse our women and can get away with it because why? WHY? they are living in the jungles and nobody's going to notice. thats not right. what makes it worse is that some of these victims are young girls. we've seen it before, and this never ends well. these girls get pregnant against their will and have to live with it. the consequences last a lifetime and this changes the community dynamics. what will happen to these girls later on? and the children they give birth to? the community has to endure all this while the people who commited those crimes in the first place get away with it. this is a huge injustice. this might sound a tad dramatic, but they're raping our land and they're raping our women and they're getting away with it. maybe its cause i'm a sarawakian that i feel quite fired up by this. no, i'm not a penan but my ethnicity is no reason why i should care less about this.

 

why arent our indigenous people being taken care of? is it because of where they choose to live? or the level of education they have? or their lifestyle? their beliefs? are these reason enough not to care for them? there are cases upon cases of land claims by natives going on in sarawak. people having their land taken away from them and are trying to claim it back. ownership of this land is not recorded because it is passed down from generation to generation. my family has got land somewhere, and its land that my grandparents inherited from their parents. they work the land, they cultivate plants on it and make a living off it. can you imagine what its like to have this inheritance taken away from you? for some people, this land is how they make ends meet. its how they feed their families. and the reason that it is taken away is because, there were no records of who owned the land in the first place. but thats a slight deviation from my main point here.

 

just because people are different is no reason to exploit them, and allow this to happen. its unacceptable and it is really offensive that nobody is taking it seriously.

 

another issue that is scaring me is how racially divided malaysia seems to be becoming. it is a multicultural country. and as such, there will always be issues of one group's interests vs another. now the part that gets scary is the way this is becoming so divisive. is there no common ground that we have any more? for me personally, i dont have a problem with people of a different background. i just hate it when people drag politics into it. race and politics is an ugly issue and there will be no end to that argument. nor is there a way to make everybody happy. its a lose-lose situation. and i'm stayng way away from it. its enough to say that its not one of my favourite conversation topics. 

 

because of all this, i am starting to worry about the future of the country. in particular, what kind of country are they creating for us to raise our children in? i cant bear to think of what the country will be like 5 years from now when i'm working and teaching.

 

it seems to me that we need a hero. i call upon CAPTAIN SIMIAN and the SPACE MONKEYS. 

 

thats enough for today. 

 

and so it has come to pass, after many calls from the health centre, that my blood test results are back. i dont think i mentioned it in my last post (not that it matters, but there should be a context established here). i had a doc's appointment and he sent me straight to the lab right after to have a blood test done. for the hormones and stuff. for further context establishing purposes, the following are the tests that i had done:

so, after having 2 tubes of blood removed from my body, $94 spent on those tests, the doctor called me after the results were back. now the doc said if everything checks out ok, he wont call me back but he will need to see me again on monday to follow up some stuff.

 

results are in. and they have found that my iron levels are low. i suppose that makes sense since i have been losing a lot of blood and i do feel quite weak nowadays. the good news is that i'm not anemic. HUZZAH!! the bad news is that i'll have to take more pills. 

 

after seeing the doc last, he said he wasnt sure if i needed a stronger dosage of the pill, but he would consult with his colleague who practices more gynaecology than he does. fair enough i guess. i mean the poor guy had to look up what was going on in his textbook, which was kinda tattered and dog eared. i bet there's not a page in that book he hasnt seen. so after consulting with his colleague, they have decided it is in my best interest that they prescribe me MORE pills. progesterone pills this time. that i have to take 3 times a day for the next 5 days :( then after the call with the blood test, he prescribed me IRON supplements (IRON MAN :P ). on top of my PILLS pills. so that means, i'll be taking THE pill, progesterone pills, and IRON pills. thats a lotta pills.

 

after the next checkup on monday (and more tests being done) they'll decide if i have to be refered to a gynaecologist. OH MY GIRLY BITS, WHY YOU GIVE ME SUCH A HARD TIME??? 

 

if you've read this far and are still willing to continue reading, you should know that i'm going to stop talking about my girly bits and move on to more inneresting things. 

 

i dont know how many international banks have closed this week and i dont know whats going on with AIG, but the kiwi dollar has plunged in value. its now 2.25 to one USD. or was in one MYR. i dont know. but either way, would prices be going up again? 2 litres of milk already costs $4.50 and cereal $6.00. bread is $4.40 already and thats a lot to pay for. just 3 simple items like that and its already almost costing $15. i know my grocery bill has increased and i'm not eating ridiculous things. its pretty much fruits, some meat, some vegies and frozen vegies...it comes up to about $30. thank god or the many gods they pay fortnightly i suppose. and i'm glad i've finished paying off my flight ticket before all this foreign exchange nonsense increases it. (see you at the end of the year) 

 

i'm looking forward to summer. there are all these plans that me and iain have come up with and it would be really nice to be able to pull them off. travelling and such. but i really have to budget for it. even if i'm still getting my allowance during that period. (ugh, period) 

 

next year is going to be really strange. some of my friends wont be around anymore, and i've gotten really close to some of them. i cant imagine not having them around since we all arrived here at the same time ON THE SAME FLIGHT. i'll definitely miss them a lot, and i suppose its a lot of adjusting to do. it kinda comes with being a student i guess, seeing people come and go. thats one of the downsides. 

 

on more inneresting news, nah i'm all out. gnight folks, and if you're in malaysia at the end of the year, i'll see ya round :) 

its really important to stay healthy. kinda sad that i've always taken my health for granted and only recently realised that. why? cause before this i could

i dont know if its my eating habits or my sleeping habits thats making my health go haywire. either way i'm just hoping that i'll find out why because whatever my body's going through is really making me very weak.

 

yes i know this is a very self-absorbed ME entry and there are other things going on in this world that are far more important than my health. 

 

or the fact that i've been having my period twice every month for the past two months at approximately less than a week apart. what boggles my mind is WHERE does all that blood come from? have i got that much blood to spare that it has to come AGAIN? its pretty crazy, and i'm eating as well as i can. i've stopped eating rice for the past few days cause it doesnt keep me full anymore. but i've substituted that for potatoes. i'm taking enough meat. fruits and veg too. so what am i doing wrong? plento of water.

 

NO i'm not pregnant and NO i'm not under/over weight.  NO, i have not taken the morning after pill and YES i'm on contraceptives. but the only reason that i am on the pill is because the last doctor i saw prescribed me THE PILL.but its gotten worse on the pill.

 

i have no idea whats wrong. its just driving me nuts cause 2 periods per month means MORE pads, MORE spills/stains, MORE cramps, MORE fatigue. its hard to keep up with things i have to do when i have to deal with feeling crampy, even with painkillers. i know it sounds petty and stuff, but when you look at it from my POV, i think its better to take a day off work because i'm feeling weak than to stand around for 5/6 hours stocking items, labelling them, walking around asking people if they need help, showing them things they want, feeling like i want to faint half the time.

 

fingers crossed the doc can figure out whats wrong with me. i'm tired of having periods TWICE monthly. i mean, what does that even mean? i know i might be anaemic after this from all the blood loss but i eat meat and dark leafy vegies. so my iron levels can be fixed.

 

moral of the story (if there can be one): if you thought having ONE period monthly, or once every few months was bad, try having it twice a month. those pads cost moneys man :( 

i have stuff to blog about. YAY!

 

 

i've been thinking about this for a while now, and i really think that some religious bodies are focusing their piety in the wrong areas. i just read this  . i hate to sound repetitive but it kinda reinforces what i think.

 

why should religious organisations focus their time and effort into petty things like these? there are other things in society that are more worthy of attention. to me, instances like these are nothing more than a witch hunt. they are meant to dupe people who are easily influenced into believing that religion is about picking out the wrongs in society and in others, when there's so much more that could be done.

 

what about helping people who come from poor homes? organising blood donation drives? fund raisers? helping victims of domestic abuse? what about tuition for students who cant afford to go to tuition centres? what about things like these? i say that these are more worthy causes than headbands with horns (which i actually have a pair of myself. NO, they do not light up, but they are soft and fluffy).

 

but that is NOT the reason why i am feeling this way about religious organisations. my point is still valid.

 

 

 

i think thats all i have to blog about today. take care there and dont let the witch hunts overtake any goodwill that should be done :) 

 

it is officially the midterm break and i'm glad we have a midterm break. it hasnt been a very hectic sem so far, but i'm always up for a holiday.

 

i've realised of late that i dont really have anything to blog about. doesnt mean that i'm not doing anything here, but i just dont feel the need to blog about it. is this what it means by growing up? i dont know. either that or its stuff i've blogged about many a time. 

 

you know...like...money. i'll always need money.

 

i've got a job now, so that eliminates any topics related to a job hunt.

 

there's room inspections this week, but my room's always a mess, so there's nothing really new there.

 

losing weight etc? i've given up. dont get me wrong, i still think its very important to take care of myself, but its just nothing new, you know?

 

mebbe if there's an earthquake or volcanic eruption or something, then i'll write about it.

 

speaking of which, i think there was an earthquake a week back. i THINK. the first of september is officially the first day of spring (its about time, really). the weather's been a lot nicer to us lately.

 

BLAH.

 

i'll blog if aliens are invading. 

 

or if i get fired up about something. like free range meat...